Patriotic Retirement Plan

[steadywoman]

Sometimes, it seems so simple...

There are 40 million workers in the USA over the age of 50. Pay each person one million dollars with the following stipulations:

1. They MUST retire...40 million jobs become available...unemployment fixed.

2. They MUST buy a new American made car...40 million cars ordered...car industry fixed.

3. They MUST either buy a new house or pay off their existing mortgage...housing crisis fixed.

P.S. If more money is needed, make all members of Congress pay their taxes...
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Bixby 110
Happily burning since 11-05

[farmich]

I'll vote for it
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The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you got it made.
- Groucho Marx

Magnum Baby countryside.

[upnort]

Good Morning. I agree. However there is one flaw in the plan. All the Administration and Congress use Turbo Tax. So we will have to lose $40,000 because of the glitch our VP Treasury found! Also if you have a house in the Bahamas it somehow does not show up in the taxes. Surprising though those mortgage CDS does not show up unless you lose money. (Read you get a refund for the loss) After you get all done and click send to the IRS, a pop up appears. Seems you owe the Government $100,000 above the 1 million you got. However there is a way out. Contact Dave Obey (Wisconsin) and he will mail you a stimulus check in 2 hours! How is that for math? UP NORT

[steadywoman]

Snicker snicker, upnort. Fuzzy math, creative financing, tax fraud...I'm still trying to figure out where the stimulus money went that was sent to districts that didn't/don't exist. What Obama supporters got that "stimulus"? I can guarantee it wasn't me... Oh, yeah, I just remembered...I'm not an Obama supporter...case closed...
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Bixby 110
Happily burning since 11-05

[upnort]

Good Afternoon. So you like my crude way of criticizing the administration? Good. Trying not to get too political in this forum. What I do is watch C-Span and the Cable news and catch their gaffs and lies. then send an email if I can get in and let them have it. If you want I can send email on PM and let you see what I have sent. Get back if you want. Then you can forward to your rep. I did not vote for present president either. UP NORT

[rb62]

Revised 1040 form under current administration,

1. Net income _____________

2. Sent it in.

Make checks out to Chinese government.

[mddorogi]

Yeah, I've heard of that plan. It's the equivalent of 50 TARP programs, and would add $40 trillion to the debt. Not sure what people would be retiring on after paying off their houses and buying cars either. Even if one had $1M to retire on, that's not enough for a 50 yr old, especially with a 30 years more life expectancy, and perhaps kids either in or to put through college.
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Mark
Dell Point Europa

[tallcorn]

Anything that seems simple probably won't work.
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Countryside 3500P (pedestal version) used 8-9 yrs, 24/7 during days requiring heat. All original motors. Burns moldy corn, and pellets equally well. Burn it if you got it.

[jdeere5220]

[mddorogi]

[BobMac]

This here is part of the plan steadywomen talks about

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, Congress has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to Congress to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Congress deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).
Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Congress.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much S.H.I.T
(Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Congress has always prided themselves on the amount of S.H.I.T they give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough S.H.I.T, please bring this to the attention of your Congressman, who has been trained to give you all the S.H.I.T you can handle.

Sincerely, The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)
PS - - Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
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Seraph Industries-Genesis 106 & 108

[jdeere5220]

[tallcorn]

BobMac, don't knock early retirement until you have tried it.
_________________
Countryside 3500P (pedestal version) used 8-9 yrs, 24/7 during days requiring heat. All original motors. Burns moldy corn, and pellets equally well. Burn it if you got it.

[upnort]

Good Evening. Retire? Not me. I worked for a good company 44 years. So one day they asked me to retire (62) I said no not really interested. They said too bad, pick up your check at 4 o'clock and clear out your desk by 5. Did I say good company? Yes, retired, moved UP NORT and have never looked back. So they actualy did something good for me.

[steadywoman]

Thanks for the giggle, BobMac. Nice continuation of the thread...
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Bixby 110
Happily burning since 11-05